The Swingers Attic

Basic Rules & Etiquette For Swingers Clubs & Parties

by on Jun.16, 2011, under Lifestyle Etiquette, Newbie Help, Unsorted

Thinking about attending an on-premise lifestyle party?
Not sure what to expect and how to behave to make a good impression?
To help give you an idea, here are some general rules & etiquette for clubs and parties.

All clubs and all parties are going to be a bit different. The policies and rules of conduct may vary greatly between clubs and will certainly be different in the private party scene, but some rules & etiquette are pretty much universal in swinging.

For any party or club one rule always stands true in the lifestyle.
The Cardinal Rule of swinging is “No means No”.
It is a rule never up for debate.
Besides the fact that breaking this rule will result in getting you kicked out of pretty much every swinging establishment on the planet it can also lead to many other not so fun consequences.
Sadly this rule is needed.
Some people just don’t get it when it comes to human interaction.

Another rule that is pretty much universal is to show respect to others.
Always respect the rights, feelings and comfort levels of others and their spouses.
Not respecting other peoples wishes and boundaries is an easy way to find yourself out the door pretty fast.

Now… let us look at some common club rules & etiquette besides the two mentioned above.
Please however make sure to familiarize yourself with the policies and procedures of the club you are attending as many clubs have very specific rules.

Some Common Club Rules:

  1. Be polite and show common courtesy. “No thank you” sounds a lot nicer than “No way”.
  2. No Drugs. Illegal drugs are not welcome at any swinging environment.
  3. Condoms are a must. Nobody is policing this, but it is a general rule. Always assume you should use a condom and always be pro active in making sure one is used.

Club Etiquette

  • Be Hygienic. Remember to bathe or shower before attending events. If you play with one partner, please wash up before playing with another.
  • Be neat and tidy.  When you are done using an area, don’t forget to clean up after yourself. Dispose of condoms, wrappers, towelettes etc… and if something happens to make a mess not easy to clean up please inform someone from the staff.
  • Be Prepared. bring extra toiletries, towels, condoms, and a change of clothes. Clubs do pretty much all offer condoms and basic items such as mouth rinse, but it may not be your first choice or of the best quality.
  • Don’t get wasted. Excessive drinking is frowned on in the lifestyle and a big no no at clubs. If you do plan on drinking more than allows you to think straight make sure you have a sober partner and a safe way home.

House parties can be more or less strict than many clubs.
They are also filled with the personal flavor of the hosts so can differ greatly in types of play and the sorts of people in attendance.

Some basic guidelines for good lifestyle house party etiquette:

  • R.S.V.P: If you are invited, it is considered proper etiquette to reply as soon as you decide whether or not you will be attending. Not letting a host know if you plan on attending is a good way to get off the guest list in the future.
  • Bring your swing stuff: Condoms, lube, chapstick, mouth rinse, towels, changes of clothing etc… Don’t expect all of these things to be provided.
  • Don’t show up empty handed: Ask ahead if you are unsure of what to bring. A beverage or food item is most common.
  • Know the room rules: Ask! Doors are never to be locked, though some may be designated as “private”, “semi-private”, or “open”. If all rooms are in use and you can only find space in an “open room” be aware that you are not required to join in to any group activity and that being in an “open room” does not give others permission to party with you. You can always say no. The cardinal rule of swinging always applies.
  • Always Clean up after yourself: Never leave a mess. Ever. Pick up your belongings and items after you have finished playing in an area.
  • Discretion is the law: If you see someone you know from outside of swinging  leave it at that. Don’t talk about it outside of swinging. What happens at the swing party stays at the swing party.
  • Have fun: Parties are for fun. Leave your drama if you have any at home. Nobody wants a party pooper around.

That’s about it.
Remember though that all clubs and parties have their own specific guidelines.
If you are not sure of them ask.

This article was written by Aarron and originally posted on another website we are no longer updating. We thought it would be a great idea to share it here on The Swingers Attic.

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